Your marriage can be steady and strong. It can be an example for others to follow, if you know the secret of making it work. Like Billy Graham, Kenneth Hagin and a host of others, you can have cause to look back and smile during your sixtieth wedding anniversary.
You must accept that you are the builder of your marriage, by being diligent and working at it. God’s Word says: By much slothfulness the building decayeth; and through idleness of the hands the house droppeth through (Ecclesiastes 10:18). There is no prize for the slothful!
This month, I want to talk about very vital things husbands and wives usually ignore in their marriage. They are very minor, yet a lot of couples ignore them.
The words, “I’m sorry”, “Thank you” and “I love you” are very short and simple words, but they are powerful words in our everyday life which must not be forgotten. Instead, they must be said every time they are needed. Forgetting these simple and very important words can cause a lot of disorder in our relationship.
Say “Sorry” every time you make a mistake and say “Thank you” for simple things done for you by your spouse. The best words that must be said everyday is “I love you”. These words when often used at home, could make the relationship grow stronger and deeper. This week, I will be looking at the word, “I’m sorry.”
“I am sorry” are two short words that can make big improvements in any marriage. By these short powerful words, our marriages and homes will be more pleasant and peaceful. Offences are bound to occur between a man and his wife, but it is not wise for any partner to just overlook things whenever one is hurt by the other person. God’s Word says: For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again (Proverbs 24:16). Admit when you make mistakes. The Bible says that because we are still in the human flesh, from time to time, we may make mistakes. But the moment the husband or wife, or both, sincerely say the words, “I’m sorry,” healing has the chance to enter and begin to soothe the emotional wounds. “I’m sorry” is a powerful healing balm that can be placed over hurt and wounded feelings. It works like fire!
So, don’t be hesitant or too proud to ask for forgiveness from your spouse or family members any time you go wrong. The Bible says, if you humble yourself under the mighty hand of God, He will lift you. Some people find it difficult to apologise to their wife, children or family members whom they had offended. God’s Word says: He that covereth his sins shall not prosper; but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy (Proverbs 28:13).
Whenever you go wrong, admit it to the person and refuse to do it again, then God’s mercy and favour are made available to you. It is pride that brought the devil from such a high place with God to the lowest pit of hell. Pride goes before a fall, so don’t let pride make you refuse to apologise any time you are wrong. Failure to admit your mistakes before your spouse is an obstacle to intimacy in marriage.
If you have offended your partner, “I am sorry” is not too much to say, meaning it from the depth of your heart. You must cultivate the habit of apologising when you are wrong. Say, “I’m sorry”, and try to mean it. We do not help anyone by defending ourselves. Avoid the word “but”! This can kill our apology. To our lover’s ears, “I’m sorry but…” translates to “I’m not really sorry, and I am just saying I’m sorry to allow myself to give an excuse.” Stop shifting blames; accept your fault each time you are wrong!
God has given you the secret of a transformed marriage, go forth and enjoy it, in Jesus’ Name! If you are not born again, you are not entitled to the peaceful married life that God has reserved for His children. However, God’s grace of salvation is extending to you right now. If you desire to be born again, say this simple prayer in faith: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”
If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).
Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through firstname.lastname@example.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).